Not Safe!

So the other night I got a call from my good friend Casey (Hate My Life) and she asked to assist in a tire change. Of course I agreed. Afterall, I am the "Husband" of the House, the "Neighborhood Boyfriend," and the "Father." I couldn't allow 2 very feminine girls go change a tire on the freeway. I could not allow that to happen...

So here I am...In the middle of the road....by myself. The girls? Where are they you ask? Late. They are late. Surprising? No.

So here I am...They are on the way...and I am debating on whether or not to sit outside of my vehicle with the over sized crickets, or sit in my vehicle where I could potentially get hit by an oncoming car. What did I do?-I sat with the crickets. I named them. We became good friends. We talked of life, love, and rocks that smell of mac n cheese.

The girls finally arrived and we were able to rescue this car from a flat tire and a citation from the city of Phoenix. As I cough up a lung and miss a dinner with a wonderful woman, she is texting me saying, "What are you doing?" I say..."changing a tire on the freeway." She responds with, "OMG be careful please!" --I love that. Concern. Something so simple. I then get a streak of feminine masculanity, and come up with "Nah I got this, don't trip." (As if I do this on an hourly basis.) Yup that's right. I change tires in the middle of the freeway on an hourly basis. Yup. Uh huh. --Not. Hell no. No way Josefina.

In all reality all I could do was talk to crickets and fear that I would be ran over by a semi. With my luck, I would have a truck driver drop his double bean burrito, and as he reached to retrieve it, go off the road and make me and the crickets windshield droppings. Death by double bean burrito would be my obituary...hmm...food for thought. :) I've always wanted to go out with a bang. Maybe a double bean burrito death wouldn't be that bad. Ha. Negative.