New Music and old too

Here you go Meisha!!! Sorry it took so long!

http://www.playlist.com/FKisKing

A DUI Bike

This is an ad that I recently found. Made me chuckle for sure. This is marketing at its best!

http://itemnotasdescribed.com/vote/page/5/
I have a collection of bikes that I call my DUI Specials and they would make good commuters. If life events (like a DUI) have caused you to find a new form of transportation take a look at these bikes and try to see the positive side of your new life. These bikes have soft seats to help cushion the rough spots in your future. As you breeze through traffic you can wave at your DUI lawyer who is stuck in traffic in his new Mercedes that you helped him buy. You can wear a back pack to carry your fresh shirt for work and your peanut and jelly sandwiches which have become your new diet.As your legs are becoming steel pistons your waist is shrinking like your wallet. You will no longer have any parking problems when you visit your parole officer or to vote for your favorite DUI judge at election time. Now a word from our DUI judge, Hugh Shouldaknownbetter.
Son, I see you blew above the limit.Let me see your license for a minute.As you walk out the door, because you’re now poorBefore you take that long, long hike.Take my advice and call Mike for a bike.
Court dismissed.
If you mention the word “drunk” when you buy a bike I will throw in a free padlock.

Someone asked me about my fantasizing habits...

Someone asked me earlier this week, "What do you fantasize about?"--It took me back for a minute, until I realized it is always the same thing.

Do you ever drive and think about how you would like to "appear" to your friends, family, and strangers? I do this. More often than I thought. Don't get me wrong. I'm not some bum who mooches off of my family and hopes that my bills get paid. I work hard for my money, and I work even harder to be successful. I have had the same job, car, and home for 2 years. This is the most consistency I have had in a long time. I'm a hustler. Born and raised. I can sell ice cubes to eskimo's. I left that lifestyle behind for consistency. I'm proud to have found it.

When I fantasize...my 2 year car, job, and home is not what I picture. Not even close. I don't picture being flighty, or being the president, or inventing something that prevents cancer. I don't see myself being a surgeon, a lawyer, not even a pilot. I want this job. It's a position that many people $hit on. It's respected, and in no way shape or form easy. I want to have my own studio, and I want my people to see me produce. Not behind the mic. That dream is long over. I want to be the one mixing a beat to make a song better, I want to revamp lyrics, I want to feel bass ringing in my ears 16 hours of my day. What good is being famous for something that doesn't describe you?

I sit in my truck, play a track over and over again. I find myself thinking in my head what kind of beats would make it 1000 times better. Or a lyrical change, some harmony, and tempo. My fantasy is to be around my one true love....Her name is Music.

I just got back from Lunch...and Jenni sent this to me LMFAO

THANK YOU TEXT FROM LAST NIGHT!!


I don't understand the purpose of the line, "I don't need to drink to have fun." Great, no one does. But why start a fire with flint and sticks when they've invented the lighter?

Jenni [5:50 PM]:
9. Do you remember when you were a kid, playing Nintendo and it wouldn't work? You take the cartridge out, blow in it and that would magically fix the problem. Every kid in America did that, but how did we all know how to fix the problem? There was no internet or message boards or FAQ's. We just figured it out. Today's kids are soft.

Jenni [5:51 PM]:
The other night I hit a new low at an open bar. I had already hopped on highway blackout when, inevitably I had to find a bathroom. Eventually I decided it was probably on the other side of the bar so I tried to walk over there, but ran into a guy coming the other way. We played that, Both go left, Both go right game to no avail, so I finally put out my hand to guide myself past and that's is when I realized, yup, that's a mirror I just tried to walk through. And the guy on the other side is me. Even cats can recognize their own image.

Jenni [5:53 PM]:
26. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teams up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers!

Arrgggghhhh!!!! Car Accident

I look like a gay pirate. I can't believe I'm going to post this, but I am. I don't care if I look ridiculous. IT explains my mood right now. so Arggghhhh!!! to the haters who think this pic isn't flattering. :)

I almost got into a terrible accident today. It scared the bajeeebus out of me. I was getting off of the 51 fwy on Indian School rd...there was some kind of liquid on the road...it looked like water, so I didn't think much of it. Not until I couldn't stop and was hydroplaning into on coming traffic. Luckily I didn't get hit. Cars swerved out of the way and stopped just in time. This liquid was drizzled on the road all the way to Osborn rd. I fish tailed again while turning onto it. I finally stopped and called 911 to notify them of the liquid. They sent some folks out there I guess. I came into work as white as a ghost, and sweating like a fat hooker in a church with no A/C. I might just leave work early tonight. I'm not sure yet. I feel like yacking, I'm tired, and a little scared just to drive home. This sucks.

Gas Station Psychics.

So I went to Circle K last night for some gasoline. Yes. Gasoline. And I was stopped by a troop of people in a Ford Expedition. They got my attention, and a girl in the backseat leaned forward and asked me if I believed in energy readings. I told her I did to a degree. She offered a free reading, so I accepted...She told me of my life. Things that strangers would not know. She told me of my parents relationship. She told me of my last love relationship in detail. She even told me of my tattoos. It was crazy. Then she had me stunned. She told me of the ripped $20 bill in my wallet. No way she would have known. It was in my wallet, and I pulled from my pocket. She also told me that my energy consumed the corner of the street. She said I was a social butterfly, and that the people who don't like me, secretly wish that they knew me....hmmm...thanks gas station psychic lady. Now I might actually go see a Psychic...see what she has to say. Holler

Alpine AZ

This past weekend Toni and I went to Alpine AZ. It is a really small place in the Eastern region of AZ...really close to New Mexico. We went up for a weekend of tranquility, a weekend for serenity, a weekend for quiet...ok it was really a weekend to learn Mexican Train. Thanks to Toni's lovely grandmother I was able to learn the wonderful game of Mexican train. It was a ton of fun, and the place was absolutely beautiful. The weekend was a success complete with jager, beer, cap guns, and pimp hats. Woot.

This motorcyclist shared the majority of the ride with us. We left Springerville together, and even traveled into Scottsdale. He was sporting some attractive sweat pants complete with a holey T-Shirt. Stud muffin to say the least. Holler!

Things that make me go Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaaha!!!

color

Faith is knowing that color exist even when your back is turned away from it.

Newest arm, back, and chest piece.

That's right. I'm going to combine all 3 of the images, if not more into my dream piece. It will cover the back of my shoulder, my arm, and some of my chest. I'm super excited. I'm finally figuring out what would be the best piece. I'm excited to save for this bad boy. woot.

My "wall"

My closet doors were recently erased. I figured I would have some pictures of it before it was extinct. I had probably 15-20 different people on here. Different messages. Some funny, some wise, some sexual. It was awesome. I dug it. I'm gonna have to invest in some expos. :)

More Mole please

I was in Wally world the other night and on my way out of the place I saw Mole. What the eff is mole?? I wasn't sure until I wikipedia'd it...Any who...who would buy this stuff in their right mind? "Can I have some more moles on my chicken mother?"
----Oh hell nah...

Well, it can't be that bad...here is the definition...

Mole can be best defined as a very thick, homogeneous sauce with complex flavors. This distinguishes it from most Mexican salsas which are watery, often raw, and contain fewer ingredients (usually nothing more than tomato, onion, garlic and chili pepper) in still-identifiable chunks.

It's not easy

Being really really really ridiculously good looking.

Toni, D, and I went to Dillards over the weekend. They are having some crazy sale, and I ran across the vest from Missy Elliot's video "Rain" Remember?? Oh yeah! It was smokin hot!! Actually it really was. I was very well covered in this, and was sweating as I paraded around Dillards allowing people to laugh at my James Bond actions. As if I wasn't noticeable enough.

Thanks Dillards...if you put my vest jacket on 80% off I'll come back and get 3 of those bad boys. Woot!

hahahahahahah*breath*hahahahahahah*breath*hahaha

Tarot

I'm not really into tarot, but my friends Toni and Tyler have these angel cards that they recently purchased. Toni interpreted the cards that were placed in front of me. I think the coolest one was the Dream card. It said that I should keep a record of my dreams. Like a dream journal. I totally love that idea....only problem is...I'm lazy. I woke up the other morning fresh out of a dream, and turned to my night stand for a journal that was under my alarm clock. I was actually going to write down what happened in my dream....until I realized that a pen was not within reach. Needless to say I did not write about my dream, and I have yet to put a pen on my night stand. I am lame. Holler!

Furry earrings/neck warmer

Cairo decided that she would take a nap on Deena's face. It worked out nicely as you can see. He's still small enough to slip between the couch cushions, and even pose as an earring or neckwarmer. Go Cairo Go!

Wild Card for Mollie and Lisa's Engagement Party

Wild Card in Chandler has made some recent "renovations" to their women's bathroom. What you see is a toilet. What used to be was a secured door that led you to the toilet. The door had a locking mechanism and everything. From what wild carder's tell me, is that someone was trying out some new gymnastic moves on the door and *BOOM!!** CRASH!!*** POW!!!*** the whole thing came tumbling down. I hope the rumors are true...I don't think another story would do this open toilet some justice.

Bacardi Dragon Berry and Lemonade...has anyone tried this yet? I only took the picture to remind myself to try it. :)

Free beers at Wild Card...how does one achieve this? I will never tell. That is between me, my best friend, and her purse. WOOT!

A trip down memory lane

I totally remember living in Southern California and having these all the time. If you had squuezits you were the friggin envy of the neighborhood. These were pretty good. I think they are still around too. I remember them advertising a lot more back then. I haven't seen a commercial in a hot minute.



Every Doctor, Dentist, and church waiting room had these magazines. I was never really interested in the articles themselves, but I LOVED looking at the back to find the "what's wrong with this picture?" It was the "Highlight" of my young adult life.

Dinosaurs!!!!!!!!!! I haven't seen an episode of these guys in a hot minute. But I remember loving the sloppy baby. Goodness I miss the 90's!

I think these things were called Turtles. I remember on a Southern Cali Summer day my sister cracked a tooth riding one of these things. My sister was the barbie doll playing type. I was the athletic tom boy. I tried convincing her to not ride it, but she did. And she got hurt. Thank God for elmo bandaids, and ice pops.

I LOVED this show. Swore by it religously. Still that one question remains....why was there only one female smurf??

If I had a dollar for everytime that I made one of these for a girl I would be quite wealthy. And if I had a dollar everytime I received a mixtape I would be a hundredaire for sure. I used to love cassettes. It only sucked when you were trying to learn a song, and you had to wait forever to rewind. Then stop on the right spot. Then fast forward, then listen again. Ah....I love CD's.

I remember these commercials so well. They had actual people act out the game. My parents never bought this. Something about a man in a house full of young girls bothered them. My mom would always ask why not "Don't wake Mommy" Thanks Mattell. You suck.

I knew so many kids who had these....to be honest they weren't that great. They served little purpose, they broke easily, and they typically only fell one direction. For whatever reason EVERYONE on the block had one. Probably because they were $0.75 from the ice cream man.

I remember these very well. I always wanted Mickey or Donald because they taste way better than Goofy or Minnie. I'm not sure why they didn't come up with another flavor. Maybe blue, green, even pink. This definitely peaked my interest in why Minnie and Goofy were the same color...made me think that rumors were true...Minnie was so cheating on Mickey with the Goofster. BUSTED!!!

Thanks for reminiscing on the 90's with me. It's not often that we remember the joys of the 90's. It's crazy to think that this all happened so long ago. Getting older is fun, but life was so much fun with ice pops and wooden toys. Woot!

Love package...SHE

If love came in pakcages, I would say that they come in fur wrapped balls that are shaped like new born kittens. Cairo...we recently found was not a HE but a SHE. I'm still having difficulty calling him ---her. Oh well. I guess she will just have to be a butch lesbian. That's how it worked for me.

Attack of the Kitties!

Toni got attacked last night by lil Cairo. As you can tell by her expression she was surprised that his claws were so sharp at such a young age. He's the guard kitty. He's frickin fierce. See?

This kid needed a hug

Cutey Pa-tooty

This is the newest baby Cairo. He is such a lil muffin. He sleeps on me. Hardly ever plays. He's a sleeper. D and I were laying around one morning, and he ended up passing out on my arm.

Is it mean that this makes me laugh?

IQ Test

Your IQ Score is: 129 You've got a very experiential way of learning and a strong mathematical mind. You're able to whittle even the most complex situation down to comprehensible component parts. In short, you have mastered the art and science of precision.


I guess I'm not as dumb as I look. :)

This is so me it's not funny

Zodiac Sign: Taurus

I always take my time.
I am good at really savoring and enjoying pleasures.
I am truly peaceful deep inside.
I am good at giving myself most everything I need.
I can make money.
I am patient.
I'm an impeccable Leader.
Once I get going, I have incredible determination and never quit.
If I want to build something in the world, I have the persistence to accomplish it.
I enjoy having nice things.I do not need other people around to be happy.
It is easy for me to give to myself.
It is easy for me to give to others.
I love money.
I really love having money.
It's good to have a big ______ (CD, book, movie, etc.) collection.
I am very practical and realistic.
When I walk, there is always a crowd following behind me.
I regularly allow myself a lot of time for my friends and those closest
I am the life of any party that I go to.
I think music is perhaps the most spiritual thing on the planet.
I believe that my spouse will be perfect, and will not stop until I find him/her.

My Personality--Extravert

Extraverted (E) 68%---an outgoing, gregarious person.

Introverted (I) 32%--a shy person.

Sensing (S) 59%--humans and animals perceive stimuli originating from outside or inside the body.
Intuitive (N) 41%--perceiving by intuition, as a person or the mind.

My horoscope.

Taurus:

Don't be surprised if your attention is taken up with a variety of different responsibilities and obligations today. Your partner might be disappointed to find that you're a little more focused on matters other than romance right now. And if you're single, just be aware that you might find yourself feeling somewhat attracted to someone a little older than yourself before the day is through.
Whatever you find yourself dealing with today, you could be feeling somewhat driven and focused. And your efforts could really end up impressing people right now. And if you play your cards right, some interesting new opportunities could be crossing your path before long.

Hand Blowy Thingy part 312654564

I got into work the other day, and a friend of mine wanted to show me the han blowy thingy! They found one! I thought it was super flippin cool. I just had to post! Send me your pics if you have any!

My Horoscope for today...I can't take much more conflict!

Taurus (April 20 - May 20) Wednesday, Aug 5, 2009

Just realize that some real opportunities could be available to you if you're willing to put yourself out there. You might be more inclined to just want to enjoy hanging around the house today though. But if you're not willing to step up to the plate right now, it could end up leaving a bad impression that won't be easy for you to correct.

Be aware that your family could be expecting an awful lot from you at this time. And there could be some real conflicts for you to have to deal with before the day is through. You’ll probably be eager to broaden your horizons and learn a little more about something new today.

My closest Friends

How do you define family? I define family in a way that some do, and most don't. I didn't grow up with a large family. I don't have any cousins, or nieces and nephews. All I have is my immediate family (6 of us) and my friends.

I consider friends to be family. Why? Because the ones who have been there through everything will ALWAYS be there. It's true. I don't need to talk to these people on a daily basis. They don't need me to call and beg for their attention. They just need me to be there when they call. I was on the phone with Summer last night. She said something to me that made me realize my bond with people. She said, "Fatty, you are the one everyone goes to for advice, and for anything we need, because we know that you are loyal and will always be there." It's true. I am Dr. Phyllis in most cases, and I do give pretty good advice. I am there when people need me. It's in my nature, and I would never turn my back on a friend. I won't change that. Not for anything. This is who I am. And I can't/won't neglect a friend for any reason.

Summer-You have always had my back. You are my watchful eye, and the girl who puts me in check the most. I love you for it. I don't know what I would do without you. I know that no matter what, you will always be there. I will always be here for you. On one condition....no more bathtubs woman! lol

Casey-Mad Cow with mad cow disease. Ah. Eeep! You make me laugh. You make me think too. You never leave me thinking that life isn't all that it's cracked up to be, even though we complain like the sky is falling on our faces. I'm so glad to have you in my life. You mean so much to me. Don't ever change.

Alesha-I love you kid. We don't have to talk often, and we still have each other on lock. You are a true friend, and a homie to me. Thank you for all that you do. You know that if you ever need anything you can call on me.

Amber-You have been apart of my family for so long that I can't even count anymore. You and I have had some rough times together. I'm so glad that I can lean on you when I need to, and I'm even happier that I can be there for you when you need a shoulder to lean on. You are an amazing friend, and I thank you for knowing my heart.

Amy- You are like a brother to me. I know we don't talk as often, but I'm hoping to change that. I know life is crazy for you between the wedding, the new house, the fiance....but I'm hoping to steal some time with you. You were there for me when I needed a friend the most. I caould never begin to repay for all that you have done. I love you, and I miss you buddy.

Brandy-My dear neighbor. You have always been the one to give awesome advice as well as a laugh. You're the only one other than me that has a key to my house. I find that funny. You are an amazing woman. I know we have had some times here at The gardens. I could never put a price on your friendship. You are beyond priceless to me.

C-You are my bro fo sho. I have known you for a minute kid! Twinkie dink! I'll never forget sleeping in the closet with you, and all of our crab filled nights. Margarita nights, beer nights, and Mike Tyson nights. :) Thanks for always listening when I needed a friend.

Meg-My straight bf. I love you. You and I have been through more shit in the last 10 years than a veteran shit shoveler at the zoo. Words could never express how much you mean to me...ok maybe there are..."do you like bananas?" :) love you!

Milli-You are an amazing girl. We share a birthday, friends, and most importantly memories. I can't remember a dull moment with you. Everytime we are around each other we go into Taurus mode, and tear up the city. This is what I love about you. I can't wait until you come to visit. I have some red paint for this city!

Priscilla-You are so awesome mama. You are one of the only women who tell me EXACTLY how it is. You don't beat around the bush. If I look busted. You tell me. And I love you for that. I need that. You have a watchful eye out for me too. I don't know what I would do if I missed everything that you have seen. Thank you for being you mama. You are one of my dearest.

Tawny- You are my sister. I am so happy to be your brother. It makes me happy to have such a role in your life. I can always count on you to make me smile. I love that about you. Put it in put it in put it in what what what!?!? I LOVE that we laugh. You are a big piece of my heart. I know that we don't have to see each other for months, and when we do, it's like we haven't missed a beat. Thanks for always being there Sis.

Jamie-Every Thanksgiving, and every Christmas I know that I have a family to spend it with because of you. You have to be one of the purest people I know. You have the kindest heart. I love that even if I can't be there physically you bring Thanksgiving to me. Pie and all. Your friendship means the world to me. I miss seeing you. We should hang soon.

Megan-My jager buddy! I love that I can count on you to have some jager when I wanna get down on the flo. You know I have your back through thick and thin. Thank you for always being there. I love that we have fun! Thank you for your friendship.

Mills- My Cali kid! LA! I love you so much mama. You have my back. Ride or die. I love love love that about you. I know that if I need someone to ride with me, you are right there to go with me. I wouldn't trade your friendship for all the jelly beans and oldies in the world.

Laura-My hot blonde buddy. You give me reality checks when I need them. You also give the best advice, and the best hugs. Your humor could keep me laughing for years. I'm so glad to have you in my life. I wouldn't change a thing. I promise to do lunch. Soon. I promise.

Alysse-You are my son. You are blood as far as I'm concerned. I know that no matter how troubled life gets, that you always and forever have my back. I love you so much. We need to have some father son time really really soon. I feel like we never see each other anymore. I love you, and I will never leave your side. Promise.

Toni-You are my very best friend. I love the trust and loyalty that we share. I could never take so many trips with one person and have so much fun. You have always been my rock. You are strong when I can't be, and you keep me grounded. Your advice means more than most. I'm glad that we can sit and do nothing, and I still feel close to you. I'm so blessed to have your friendship, and I'm even more blessed to have the memories that we have. I love you. And you will always be my Right Hand Woman.

Mia Mia!

Mia got caught in the jungle. I was watching TV and I saw that Mia was enjoying the foliage on the coffee table. I thought it was cute. I wish the pixelation on my phone was better. I totally would have photo shopped this one to death. I love her. She's my little siamese mama. I just hope she can hunt in the jungle!